August 23, 2008 - Dear Max,

Dear Max,
All the worries I had about how this new baby was going to affect you went away when I saw you immediately bond with your brother. After a bit of observing him, you were ready to sit next to him, rub his head and hold his hand.

There are so many great things about having siblings. They're your first best friend and hopefully your last best friend. You'll make other friends along the way and there will be times you and your brother will go in opposite directions. However, those other friends will come and go; you and your brother will always be connected.

You two come from the same place. Some day when you're older you'll be able to share notes about your childhood and upbringing and figure out together how you became who you are.

I know about the brother bond because I have two of my own. We've gone through much together and despite our differences we'll always be together. I spent years playing with them, years competing with them and years recovering with them. They know me better than anyone and I know them best. We may disagree on lots of stuff. Yet, when need be, we're there for each other.

That all being said, there were many times during this pregnancy that I worried what having a second child was going to do to you. I love and admire you so. You're so full of life. I love watching you learn and grow. I worried that a second child was going to take time away from you and somehow lessen your spirit.

I first started to let this feeling completely go when your brother was born. I remember the relief it brought me when I said "It's a boy." I never cared whether you or your brother were to be boys or girls. Yet there was a sudden peace both times when I learned you were boys. This was especially true with your brother, who we expect will be our last child. Somehow just knowing that I had two boys helped me picture the rest of my life. It would have been the same feeling if he was a girl. The reality gave me peace.

After your brother was born, I remember walking to the waiting room where you and other family was gathered. I remember picking you up to show you your baby brother in the cart that was being wheeled by. You said "My brother" and again the worries further disappeared.

My dad always told the story that when Uncle Kenny first saw me he said "Do we have to keep him?"

You took to your brother instantly. You quickly sat next to him, patted his head and held his hand. Watching you bond with him was remarkably beautiful.

I hope that you and your brother become best friends for a lifetime. And I thank you for helping me get over my worst fears.