Dear Alex, You amaze me. You do everything we do. I go to put on your shoes and you insist on putting on your shoes. I try to help you drink water and you pull it out of my hand. You see Max drawing and you demand paper and crayon. I play baseball with Max and you crawl over and grab the ball or the bat. Mama hands you a tissue and says "Wipe your mocos" and you do. She's even gotten you to wipe your pene.
You're almost walking. You've taken at least 10 steps at a time. You were almost there a couple weeks ago and then you started feeling a bit lousy and your practicing slowed down. This week we got you one of those wooden walking toys and you do it over and over and over. After a few days of mom chasing you to help you get it unstuck, you started moving it on your own.
You are a determined little boy. Strong physically and strong willed. You know what you want and you go get it or demand that one of us gets it for you.
Dear Alex, Tonight during your bath you performed a couple of tricks that reminded me it's time to do give you an update on who you are.
The big new is that you are almost walking. For the past week or so, you take a few steps on your own before crashing into the couch, reaching out for one of us or simply sitting on the floor. Your record is about 10 steps. You also continuously stand up by yourself and stand in place.
For a few months you've been doing this Donald Duck impersonation. Hard to explain on the written page. Perhaps it's enough to say you make these quaking sounds.Tonight during your bath you were doing your impersonation on demand. I'd say, "Alex, do Donald Duck." And you would comply with your quaking. Mama came with video camera in hand when it was time to take you out. Unfortunately, by then you were quaked out. I thought I had my youtube viral video!
You also did a new trick tonight. You held onto the side of the tub and crouched all the way down to where just your neck and head were above water. Then you'd pop up smiling. You did this over and over and then suddenly stopped. This is when it became a trick rather than just a new move. I'd say "down" and point down and you'd go down. I'd say "up" and point up and up you'd go. We both laughed. (Again, where was that darn camera).
A favorite activity lately is to put things in and out. It could be a car into a box or a block into a can. You even marveled last night in the tub when I put your arm in and out of a long bucket.You've also become so animated. You've always been a happy boy: smiling, laughing and simply content.
Lately you've reached a new stage of marveling at the world and showing excitement about things. Perhaps perfectly explained by our visit to the zoo today. This seemed to be the first time you were excited about seeing all the animals and creatures. You held my finger and ran to the fish tanks. You stared at the monkeys in the tree. You pointed to the meerkats.
Your interaction with your brother has changed too as the two of you grow. Max is fiercely trying to discover his place in the world while you are still patiently waiting for things to come. Thus, he's more aggressive and you don't quite understand. One minute he'll pull toys out of your hands and insist everything his "mine." The next he'll say "I love Alex" and give you a hug -- sometimes too strong of a hug for your liking, but a definite hug. You patiently take it all.
Perhaps I'm reading too much into it. But I think the older/younger brother relationship is starting to form: Max is trying to learn to be the leader brother and you're trying to find something that interests you.
Dear Jane Nelson, First, thanks for your book Positive Discipline. My wife and I just took a PD class and now I'm reading your book. It's a revelation. It's changing the way I interact with my children. And it's got me reflecting on my upbringing and making me confront why I am who I am and do what I do. I mean all of this in a good way!
I think this story explains your point about needing to figure out why someone does what they do rather than jump to conclusions.
Our three-year-old ran across the room and basically tackled his one-year-old brother. He laid on top of him and held him tight. All the why he was smiling and laughing.My wife and I reverted to what you'd call reptile brains and aggressively pulled Max off his brother.
We then violated all your rules and yelled at him, put him in his room and shut the door. The whole time he was smiling and laughing.
A few minutes later he came out of his room, still smiling and laughing, and said to his mama "Mama, wasn't that amazing!"
"What was so amazing," mama puzzingly asked.
"I was hugging Alex. You were hugging me. And papa was hugging all of us."
We learned our lesson.
We then gave Max a lesson on how to hug his brother.
Dear Alex,
