January 29, 2011 - Dear Mr. Picasso

Dear Mr. Picasso, Please tell me how to nurture this boys' interest and talent.

Not sure how or when he learned it. Certainly it wasn't from me.

But my Alex seems to be drawing at a level beyond his years. Of course much of his work is just lines and colors. But at two-years-old, his lines and curves and other shapes seem much sharper than his brother at an older age.

And this drawing of what Alex named himself "Beaver on a Branch" just blew me away.

January 28, 2011 - Dear Dr. Jazz

Dear Dr. Jazz,
My attempt to relive part of my childhood this week started off great, took a turn in the middle and then ended up okay. I took the X Boys to see Chaplin shorts that were playing at a church with a live organist.

I have lots of fond memories going to see Chaplin films at the theater and then at Dr. Jazz, an old Chicago ice cream parlour.

Before going, I found a few shorts on youtube to introduce the boys to The Tramp. All went well until I put on The Kid before running upstairs.

Irma told me Max was the most shook up and sad that she's ever saw him. Someone stole a baby and Max couldn't relate to what he was seeing. He questioned. He cried. He got quiet. All while I was upstairs. I came down expecting to see a boy excited to see Chaplin films and instead found a boy that in a way lost his innocence.

Parenting Lesson # Whatever: Kids at this age can't distinguish between cartoon violence and real violence. Of course, that begs the question of why parents allow their kids to watch lots of different cartoons, but that's their deal. I'm done trying to save the world. Please just let me do right by my kids.

We ended up going to see the films, which due to technical difficulty started late. The first was about The Tramp getting drunk and acting silly. We explained that away as him drinking "Funny Water." We didn't make it through all three films.

Parent Lesson # Whatever + 1: There is plenty of time to introduce your kids to what you loved as a kid.

January 7, 2011 - Dear Heroes

Dear Heroes,
I remember my mom saying that when I was young my father was my hero.

While seeing the movie The Fighter I realized that whether my boys' say it or not, I am their hero.

What a wonderful and scary thing to be.

I hope they're proud of me forever.

January 22, 2011 - Dear Mt. Everest,

Dear Mount Everest,
I'm predicting that in about 25 years there will be another boy making his attempt to climb you.

My Alex has become quite the climber. Seems like we can't leave him alone for a second without him finding something to climb. One day mama finds him on the kitchen counter. One day I find him sitting in the bathroom sink.

Again, when did he grow so much?

November 10, 2010 - Dear Alex,

Dear Alex,
Some updates on you.
You shocked me when you counted to 20 this week. When did you learn that? And when did you get so big? And for that matter, when did you walk and talk and ...?

You're growing up so quickly.

You started a new school this week. Mama casually asked you if you wanted to go to school and you surprised us when you quickly said "yes." We went to look at the school that three of your cousins went to and you decided that this was no your school. We took you to buy a lunch box like your brothers'.

All of a sudden you displayed this sense of independence and this confidence that amazes us. It all just makes us more curious about the person hidden inside that small body.

Of course, just when we think you're such a big boy you do something like a little kid. You fell off the edge of the bench outside Las Paletas.

You were fine soon after you got over the pain (and got a new paleta). But you had a scar that lasted a week or so.

November 3, 2010 - Dear America,

Dear America,
What the hell are you doing voting for so many damn Republicans?

How can I take my former love of politics seriously when Sarah Palin is taken seriously by anybody let alone some huge percent of the public?

How can I respect my former career as a journalist when they print and broadcast every crazy, ill informed and false thing she says?

I'm sorry boys that these are the people that are making the decisions that will shape the world you grow up in.

November 2, 2010 - Dear Alex,

Dear Alex,
Today I had one of my best moments with you.

Mama and Max left for school. You and I were supposed to go to the gym before I dropped you at Miss Leslie's, like I do most Tuesdays and Thursdays. However, you had other plans.

Perhaps it was a delayed Halloween hangover or something that made you so tired. You walked into the bedroom and pointed to the bed. At first I thought you wanted your beloved Mickey Mouse. I soon realized what you wanted. "You want to lay down?" I asked. You nodded. "I'll lay down with you," I said. So I did. And you did too.

You laid right next to me face to face. You let me put my arm around you and held you close. You just stared at me. I told you how incredible you are. I told you how you're such a good learner, such an active boy and how much you love your family. I told you how proud I am of you, how I love watching your brain work, how I love watching you and your brother interact, how he teaches you and then suddenly he's following you.

I told you how your brother will be your best friend forever and how he'll protect you and laugh with you.

I told you how much I love that you're such a happy boy.

And you rubbed my chin just like Max loves to do when he's sleepy.

And I said "Ok Alex. It's time to close your eyes." And you closed your eyes and fell asleep.

A few minutes later I started to get up to leave and you said "Daddy here." And I stayed.

An hour later, I woke up. Another 15 minutes later you woke up.

I never made it to the gym. You made it to Miss Leslie's 30 minutes late.

It was a great morning!

August 30, 2010 Dear Weights & Measures,

Dear Weights & Measures
Alex weigh in at 27 lbs 8 oz, whic in the 50th percentile of kids his age.

He measured 34 1/2 inches, which is the 55th percentile.

September 4, 2010 Dear My Lucky Stars,

Dear My Lucky Stars,
This week I heard about a couple kids close to me who have different illnesses that are going to affect their entire lives.

I thank you my lucky stars that my boys are so healthy!

August 23, 2010 - Dear Alex,

Dear Alex,
These two years have gone so fast. Seems like you've been part of our family forever. Sometimes I think you fit in so well, you might not get the attention you deserve.

You constantly amaze me. I know that you're listening and learning all the time. Yet it amazes me when I see you do something or say something that I know you learned from watching your brother or listening to us.


You look so much like your brother yet you definitely have your own personality. He's your hero. He's your best friend. And, yes, sometimes he's your tormentor: nothing big; just takes your toys or your stuffed animals or such.

In lots of ways you and your relationship with Max reminds me of me. I had an older brother who looked like me and having the instant competition probably pushed me to do stuff more quickly. Yet there were certainly times it would have been nice to be the older one who got to set the rules. Your mama and I try to make sure you get alone time with both or one of us. In these moments you seem more mature and more in charge.

At this point you're into your babies (stuffed animals), agua de coco and exploring anything new. You've grown from being the baby to the Big Guy. You like to play sports -- yet not as much as your brother. You love books. You love your family. You have an infectious laugh. And -- like your brother -- you are beautiful.

This next year should be a big one for you. We're building a new house. You're starting school (first day care and then a year from now you'll likely be with Max at Montessori school). And you'll fully grasp speaking.

I love my Big Guy. I already miss my baby. And I look forward to seeing the man you become.

July 20, 2010 - Dear Family

Dear Family,
Real work started on our house today. They started tearing down the walls and gutting the inside of the house. It finally seems real!

Mama and I have talked about creating a house for our family for a long time. First it was going to be over here. Then there. And finally this is the house we decided to buy, re-create and add on to. The house was in the neighborhood we wanted. And most importantly we fell in love with the magical back yard.

The one thing I insisted this house have is a big room. I'm sure that goes back to my childhood where we had one big room that we basically lived in. The big room is where the tv, pool table and most hanging out took place.

Looking back I'm not sure how we lived in that small ranch house with two real bedrooms and one bathroom. Yes, there was another bedroom that was really designed to be an office. And yes, when we were teenagers we added a bedroom and bathroom to the basement four brother Kenny. But the basement wasn't really great. And that seemed like so late in life!

Or maybe I should wonder why we need such a big house today? We'll end up with around 2,500 square feet, two bathrooms, lots of potential add on space, a huge back yard and one bedroom!

Yes, we're spending lots of money to build what is really a one bedroom house. There is a modest master bedroom. And then there is another big room that could be split into two bedrooms someday. Our plan is to build mobile beds that can be moved to wherever the kids want to be that night. If they want to sleep close, we'll move the beds close. If they want alone time or time with just mama or just papa, we'll move the beds apart.

The big open kids room also includes space for a small big room. This is intended to be a play area for you boys separate from the big room. We hope our house becomes a gathering place. And we suspect that at times you'll want to escape the adults.

Our new big room is going to be the whole existing house! We're gutting the whole house to make one big room! There will be a kitchen and mud room. Everything else is dedicated to the big room. There will be room for tv, dining room table, fireplace, separate sitting area and who knows what else! I see lots of puzzles put together on the big open floor. Card games at the table. And probably a hockey game or two when mama and papa aren't around!

We also have potential to add two bedrooms or an office upstairs. The budget didn't quite allow that to be put in now. But I'm guessing you boys as teenagers will want to move upstairs. This means mama and I can take over your space as a entertainment room, exercise room or whatever.

I'm excited and nervous about the new house. It's a huge money investment. Up until this point I've lived "below my means" in terms of what I could afford. The past couple of years I've been paying at least two mortgages a month -- or about what I'll be spending once this house is done -- and it hurts! I've sold a couple of rental houses to help pay for this new house. And I'll pay more of the big debt when I sell our current house and perhaps another rental. So basically I've taken whatever I've made from the house renting business and put it into our family house. And we bought the house just before the real estate market collapsed and sold the rental after the collapse. Arg!

The plan is to live here for a long time. My parents bought the house I grew up in a few months before I was born. My dad sold the house only a few years before he died. I knew one house. I knew one big room. I never thought I'd repeat that. But I don't see a way out of this now!

I want you boys to have memories of a happy home.

We're creating a space where we hope you'll be happy and inspired.